Get Thinner Here!

The above exclamation was blinking on a sign I drove by the other day. A weight loss clinic? In that building? Looks like the paint store is taking up all the -- oh. Right. Paint thinner.

I've spent some time since then discussing with myself the implications of the fact that even though the blinking lights were on a paint store sign, I immediately assumed it was for a weight loss clinic. Am I so accustomed to my culture's preoccupation with appearance and slimness that any other option is barely plausible? Seriously, it took me over a block to realize my mistake. Additionally, did the company realize what they were saying? Usually, when you're used to thinking of something from one perspective, it's hard to recognize a different perspective unless someone points it out to you - like that line drawing that's a young lady with a hat - wait! it's an old crone! - wait! You know, the one they always pull up in Psychology class. Had anybody ever walked into the paint store, looked puzzled, and asked about the weight loss clinic?

And what about people for whom English is just barely a second language? How does one explain to them that Get Thinner Here can mean two different things at exactly the same time? I love playing with English, listening to it knot up into itself and then fluidly unravel, like some kind of linguistic jellyfish. I'm looking into getting certified to teach ESL, to some extent because I get such a kick out of the language and want to pass it on, to let these outsiders in on the joke. Because I would hate to see someone walk into an LA Weightloss Center with their dried-up paintbrushes and not understand when everyone laughs.

FO

Finished the Hemlock Ring Blanket. I loved this project, although it got kinda boring toward the end. The pictures weren't as blurry on Flickr...






For those of you who are interested in these things, I used five (maybe six? I lost count) balls of Cascade Indulgence - an alpaca/angora blend that's extremely yummy, as long as you don't have to rip it too often. It's about four feet across, and it's destined to be a lap blanket for My Hero's grandmother, who turns 100 on November 18. She's spunky and spry, living on her own and active in her church.


Also, in yarny and bloggy news, I received my prize for bravest delurker from WoolGathering the other day - a fabulous...uh...stuff bag-type thingy for holding knitting notions - yarn needles, row counter, etc. And a tape measure that looks like a cake! And in case you're just joining us (insert irony here), this prize is the reason this blog exists; the big question is whether I'll be able to keep it up now that I'm not sloshed and waiting for my swag.

Happy St. Crispin's Day

This speech (from Henry V) is guaranteed to send shivers - especially if read aloud. It is, in my opinion, the best argument for why we should be teaching kids Shakesepeare.

Westmoreland:
O! that we now had here
But one ten thousand of those men in England
That do no work to-day.

King Henry V:
What's he that wishes so?
My cousin Westmorland. No, my fair cousin:
If we are marked to die, we are enow
To do our country loss; and if to live,
The fewer men, the greater share of honour.
God's will, I pray thee, wish not one man more.
By Jove, I am not covetous for gold,
Nor care I who doth feed upon my cost;
It ernes me not if men my garments wear;
Such outward things dwell not in my desires:
But if it be a sin to covet honour,
I am the most offending soul alive.
No, faith, my coz, wish not a man from England:
God's peace, I would not lose so great an honour
As one man more, methinks, would share from me
For the best hope I have. O, do not wish one more.
Rather proclaim it presently through my host,
That he which hath no stomach to this fight,
Let him depart. His passport shall be made
And crowns for convoy put into his purse:
We would not die in that man's company
That fears his fellowship to die with us.
This day is called the Feast of Crispian:
He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,
Will stand a-tiptoe when the day is named,
And rouse him at the name of Crispian.
He that shall see this day and live t'old age,
Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours,
And say "To-morrow is Saint Crispian":
Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars
And say "These wounds I had on Crispin's day."
Old men forget: yet all shall be forgot,
But he'll remember with advantages
What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,
Familiar in his mouth as household words
Harry the King, Bedford and Exeter,
Warwick and Talbot, Salisbury and Gloucester,
Be in their flowing cups freshly remembered.
This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne'er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remember'd;
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he today that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition:
And gentlemen in England now abed
Shall think themselves accursed they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day. (IV, iii)

That's What Happens When You Drunk-Blog

So...if any of you (or the two of you) have been trying to link to my blog, I was recently informed that I had a typo in my blog url - it's now correct: iamalpineflower.blogspot.com. You'll notice that the original url had an extra "l" after the p. Shouldn't start a blog after two (large) glasses of wine...this has been a public service announcement.

Ugh

We have friends who say that God brings couples together and gifts them so that when they have children, one of them will be able to handle blood, and the other will be able to handle vomit. Unfortunately, this weekend our little family discovered that God overlooked us - neither My Hero nor I can handle vomit. The Doodle came down with the stomach flu on Friday night and both her parents just about lost their own cookies during the cleanup. I also have to admit that I was relieved to be leaving for a two-night retreat and didn't have to deal with her the rest of the time she was sick (I think I need to do some penance for that. Poor man!). When I came back, My Hero had come down with it. We're all better now, but quiet. I expect I'll come down with it sometime in the next week - there is little more dread-full than anticipating a GI virus.

The Doodle is still pretty clingy and whiny. This was her first experience with vomiting...tossing her cookies...feeding the fishes...(I had a youth pastor who collected these euphemisms - he was just a barrel of laughs, let me tell you).

In order to end on a positive note, I knitted a hat for my brother over the weekend! Nothing like sitting in a series of lectures to get things done.

Cardinal Rule

Gracious, it's been two weeks. No wonder no one's reading this thing...I know the number one blogging rule is blog often. Sigh. Maybe posting a few pics will make it better...


My Hero and I went to Oregon this past weekend. We went with another couple and stayed at a B&B on the Oregon coast, south of Newport. I was slightly worried that we'd be jeopardizing our friendship by traveling together, but we had a blast! We left the Doodle at home with my mom, and although she was slightly traumatized by our extended absence, she's recovered nicely and we had a great time without her. She had fun with Grandma, and Grandma definitely had fun with her.